Just wanted to say, you don't have to practice Vajrayana Buddhism in the Tibetan tradition. I'm in the tradition, have been for 35 years,  but don't practice as a Vajrayana student.

It depends what you mean of course. If you mean just that you got some blessings from a Tibeta Lama and went to some colourful  ceremonies then most have probably done that in the Tibetan traditions.

But if you mean the guru pupil relationship etc etc - well I'm sure for Tibetans in Tibet also, few can have followed it like that. I mean few compared to the population of Tibet.

And I think it's a bit sad that so many Westerners seem to think they aren't really practicing as a Buddhist unless they can find themselves a guru in that sense. It's like, if you can't get on board with that, they may despair of Buddhism.

It's perfectly all right to just be a good Buddhist, like you can be a good Christian. It's no different really. Few Christians feel that they have to become a monk or a nun, or a hermit or a minister or a missionary to be a Christian. Why do so many Westerners feel they have to become someone who spends hours every day meditating and practices many advanced Tibetan practices to be a Buddhist?

You can go for refuge at some point, if you want to make a strong connection to the Buddhist path.

Perhaps take one or more of the five precepts. Some go on to take the bodhisattva vow, but there's no need to do that. Meditate a bit if you like, but many Buddhists don't meditate.

Practice generosity, compassion, loving kindness. Try to be open and understanding. So many just seem to think these are unimportant and that what you need to do is to rush into the vajrayana as quickly as possible - but this is the core of the Buddhist teachings, just as it is in Christianity and just about all the major religions. This is what it is all about.

This idea that you absolutely have to somehow find a teacher who not only teaches the Buddha dharma but is your guru as well - I think that is quite kind of stressful for some Westerners.

Of course if you are lucky to meet and make a close connection with a wonderful teacher like Tai Situ Rinpoche, that's great.

However,  that's just a blessing, no matter how many colourful ceremonies you do, unless somehow you do really see him as the Buddha, truly, a connection that can't be simulated, that his teachings and advice is actually opening you out to wisdom and compassion, and loving kindness in a boundless way.

That has to come from your side in some kind of a natural spontaneous way. It is a really uncommon thing to happen, that you connect to someone so directly like that. It doesn't have to be a person, it can also be animals, plants, inanimate things like a stream, and it can happen in any moment in your life. Main thing is something outside yourself, not yourself.

You can't make it happen, because you respect someone or know that they are a great teacher or anything like that.

If it does happen, though, then this connection can arise of teacher and guru.

But I think it may also be part of the reason for so much turn over. Like - the feeling you may get in some Western Buddhist centers that either you have to be doing lots of "advanced practices" or you had better leave.

Indeed these are not really "advanced practices" - it all depends on your situation. What they are really is a kind of a medicine.

If you are diabetic, you need insulin, so you may need the very advanced medical practice of getting regular injections of insulin, maybe have to do it yourself, may need to monitor your blood sugar levels every day.That doesn't mean that everyone should take up this medical routine. Few people would look at a diabetic and say "Oh I so wish I could have this complex medicine" and pester their doctor to diagnose them as a diabetic.

If you are a diabetic though, it's wonderful if you can meet a doctor who diagnoses your disease and prescribes the medicine you need to cure your diabetes or at least to manage it.

It's a bit like that. If you are on a path that needs a teacher in this sense of a guru who directly connects you to the inspiration of the teachings of the buddha, and are lucky to meet the teacher you need, great!

If you then follow that path, sincerely, wonderful, keep it up :).

But if not - that's also great!

And be happy to be a good Buddhist following the path in your own way as best you can. That's the situation for all Buddhists in the Therevadhan traditions. And - true of the Buddha's first disciples also.

There is something there that corresponds to the Vajrayana approach. Tghat;s the Buddha's flower sermon in the Zen Buddhist tradition. The Flower Sermon - Zen Buddhist Sutra - that's really what the heart of the Vajrayana is about - that at some point there is a truth to be seen, which can't be understood in words or intellectually. They are like the finger pointing at the Moon.

If you sincerely follow the Buddha's path, you may encounter the truth behind the teachings.

And one thing my meditation teacher for most of the last few decades taught me is that it doesn't matter what path you are following. You can always say that this is your path, this is the path that leads to enlightenment, that everything is in this path and that no other path is needed.

That's the best attitude for any practices you do. Even if it is as simple as putting out seven bowls of water for the Buddha in the morning to invite him into your life. Or some act of generosity you do during the day. You can think that this is the only practice that is needed, that this practice alone will lead to enlightenment and free all beings of suffering and bring them to happiness. 

With that simple approach then there is much less of this continually looking over your shoulder, and wondering if you should be doing something different from what you are doing now,and whether some big complex practice, or whether following another teacher or this or that or the other thing will solve everything.

I think this is a good attitude for other religious paths also, and for non religious paths too. Like, if you paint a picture, or make a piece of music, or work in your garden, or write a poem, or arrange a business meeting, or whatever, to put all your heart into it. It's a kind of Zen approach to life. And actually, that is what vajrayana is about, in its essence, what inspires it.

For more on this, see Shantideva's flowchart :). here: Sugatagarbha on Shantideva